So do not fear for I am with you, do not be dismayed for I am your God, I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10 (NIV).
A couple weeks ago, I went to church alone for the first time on a Sunday morning. I had avoided Sunday morning service for a while because my husband and I used to go as a family, and I knew it would be a painful reminder of my broken/failed marriage. Although the message spoke to me and I was feeling God’s presence throughout the service, I was still holding on to the hurt.
Loneliness has been my source of pain recently. Trust me, it’s PAINFUL! After being in such a long relationship, it’s a sad, scary, and unfamiliar feeling. Strangely enough, it has been my choice, at times, to be alone because I felt like I needed to learn or “get used to” being alone and just maybe those dreadful feelings would dissipate.
Then, the other night, as I was reflecting on a recent church service, and journaling about some verses I read…it hit me! I’m never, EVER alone! He’s always there! I don’t need to learn to be alone, I need to trust that He is always with me. Don’t you just love when his promises HIT you right when you’re in the midst of doubt?
The truth is, I’ve been feeling lonely, not because of the loss of a relationship, but because I’ve been trying to find contentment outside of God. When I’m FULLY seeking Him it’s impossible to feel alone. I had not been fully seeking Him, I’ve just given Him parts of me. In the moment I realized this truth and recognized my doubt, I was overwhelmed with peace and comfort once again! My loneliness was really God’s cry for me.
Soon, I’ll be experiencing many life changes, including moving into a new home. To many people it may seem that I’ll be alone…but I’m not. He will be there.
From My Heart,